Finding Happiness With You
by booksandteabags
Summary: A re-write of the end of the movie, starting after the play and continuing on from there. Written in script format.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello readers. I wrote this during Script Frenzy. However, since it is 100 pages (as is Script Frenzy standard) I have broken it up into 20 smaller "chapters." I plan to upload one chapter a day.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. THEATER LOBBY-EVENING

Mr. Perry leads Neil through the lobby, not letting him stop to talk to his friends. Neil smiles at his friends as he passes them, although there is a sadness in his eyes and his smile is strained. The Dead Poets call out to Neil, but Mr. Keating shushes them, sensing that there is trouble for Neil.

EXT. OUTSIDE THEATER-EVENING

Mr. Perry leads Neil to the car, which is parked partway down the block. The Dead Poets and Mr. Keating stand in front of the theater and watch Neil and Mr. Perry walk away.

TODD

[To Mr. Keating]

Will he be alright?

MR. KEATING

He will be, if he keeps his wits about him.

INT. PERRY LIVING ROOM-NIGHT

Mr. Perry walks into the room, followed by a downcast Neil.

MR. PERRY

Edith!

Mrs. Perry walks into the room a few moments later, a confused look on her face. Upon seeing Neil her confusion turns into something resembling sadness.

MR. PERRY

Neil, I thought I told you to give up this silly acting business. Why are you so intent on disobeying us? We've raised you right Neil. You shouldn't be acting out like this.

NEIL

But, father I...I had to. No one else knew my part. The whole play would have been ruined.

MR. PERRY

I don't give a damn about the play!

NEIL

Father...

MR. PERRY

No, Neil, you listen to me. From now on you are done with this acting crap. You are going to study hard, and go to medical school. Once you're done with medical school you can do whatever the hell you want.

NEIL

Good! As soon as I finish medical school I'll start acting and all of that money you spent on medical school will have gone to waste. I won't even wait that long to get back into acting! I'm not going to just give it up! Even if I do end up in medical school, which I am going to fight very hard against, by the way, I'll do community theater in my free time.

MR. PERRY

You won't have any free time in medical school!

NEIL

I'll make some!

Throughout this whole exchange Mrs. Perry has looked between her husband and her son, a defeated look on her face.

MR. PERRY

[his face livid]

You are no longer my son.

NEIL

Father...

MR. PERRY

Don't call me that ever again. You have half an hour. Get out.

NEIL

Mother, you honestly can't agree with him.

Mrs. Perry opens her mouth to speak, but Mr. Perry cuts her off.

MR. PERRY

Don't be ridiculous! Of course she agrees with me! Now go!

Mr. Perry storms out of the room. Mrs. Perry has tears streaming down her face.

NEIL

Mother...

MRS. PERRY

Go, Neil. Go before he decides to do something worse.

Neil nods, walking out of the room. He pauses at the door to look at his mother one more time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

EXT. STREETS OF VERMONT-NIGHT

Neil, who is bundled up and has a backpack on his back, walks through the snowy streets, bent over against the cold.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT/VERY EARLY MORNING

Todd is sitting on his bed, scribbling away in a notebook. He looks tired, but he also looks as if he has too much on his mind to sleep. The door opens to reveal a snow-covered Neil, who just stands in the doorway. Todd looks up from his notebook when the door opens.

TODD

Neil!

NEIL

[through chattering teeth]

Hi.

TODD

W-what happened? Why are you covered in snow?

NEIL

Had...had to walk here from my house.

TODD

Oh, Neil...

Todd sets his notebook aside, jumps up, and makes his way towards Neil. Todd closes the door.

TODD

You should get out of those wet clothes. Here, let me take your bag.

Neil doesn't say anything, but does as Todd says. When Neil is in dry clothes he stands in the middle of the room, shivering.

TODD

You...you should, um, sit on the radiator.

Neil nods, and moves to sit on the radiator. Todd pulls the blankets off of both of their beds and wraps them around Neil.

TODD

Should I sneak down to the kitchen to get you some tea or something?

NEIL

No...stay with me.

Todd nods. There are a few moments of silence.

TODD

Neil, what happened?

NEIL

My father was really, really mad at me. But I was so mad at him too, so I yelled at him. Told him I'd never give up acting and that I'd never become a doctor. So he disowned me.

TODD

Neil, I'm sorry...I...I don't know what to say.

NEIL

Don't be sorry. I mean yeah, it kind of sucks that he disowned me, but don't you realize what this means? If my father disowned me, than I never have to listen to him, so that means I can stick with acting, and I won't ever be pressured into going to medical school anymore!

Neil jumps up, bounces over to Todd and hugs him. Todd looks surprised at first, but then hugs Neil back.

TODD

You're amazing.

Neil pulls out of the hug.

NEIL

What?

TODD

You...in the play...you were amazing.

NEIL

Thank you.

TODD

I...you were so...inspiring...that I wrote a poem.

Todd points to the notebook sitting on his bed as he says this. Neil looks towards where Todd is pointing, obviously surprised.

NEIL

You...you did?

TODD

[bashfully]

Yes.

NEIL

Can...can I read it?

TODD

I...it's not done yet...and...I'm not ready, so not yet...but I promise, I'll let you read it eventually.

NEIL

Todd, it's ok. If you don't want me to read it, it's fine.

TODD

No, I want you to read it, just...it's not quite ready yet.

NEIL

I look forward to reading it.

There are a few moments of silence in which Neil's face falls. Neil sinks down onto his bed.

TODD

It's scary, isn't it? Getting disowned. I know you said you're happy about it, but it also seems like it's getting to you.

NEIL

Yeah. I mean, I love that I don't have to listen to my father anymore, but at the same time I'm terrified, because my father won't even talk to me, and I have no idea where my mother stands on all of this, and the whole idea of not having parents terrifies me, you know? I've had them look after me my whole life, and now it looks like I might not have any parents at all.

TODD

Neil...I-I think you should go talk to Mr. Keating tomorrow. I don't know how to help you, but I think he might be able to.

NEIL

Todd, you're brilliant.

TODD

[bashfully]

Thanks.

NEIL

Can we go to bed now? Everything that's happened today has wiped me out.

Todd nods.

NEIL

Here, let me give you your blanket back.

TODD

No, keep it for tonight, you're still shivering.

NEIL

We'll share it then. Come here.

Neil, who is tucked under the two blankets lifts them up, inviting Todd in. Todd stands in the middle of the room, looking torn.

TODD

Neil...I-I don't...

Todd shifts his weight back and forth, and Neil sits up, wrapping the blankets around him like a cape.

NEIL

What?

TODD

[blushing]

Nothing. I-I'll just sleep without a blanket tonight.

Todd turns towards his bed, so that his back is to Neil. Neil stands up, and takes hold of Todd's wrist.

NEIL

Todd...what's the matter?

TODD

[his voice on the verge of hysterical]

What's the matter? The "matter" is that you just got disowned and all I can think about is kissing you!

Neil's eyes open wide with shock. Todd, upon seeing the look on Neil's face sinks down onto his bed, hiding his head in his hands. After a few moments Neil places a hand under Todd's chin, and raises Todd head so that they can look each other in the eye. Todd's eyes are full of insecurity. Neil bends down so that their faces are at the same level.

NEIL

I want you to...would you?

Todd smiles and nods before kissing Neil. Todd and Neil end up lying next to each other on Todd's bed, their blankets wrapped around both of them. Neil is still shivering ever so slightly, so Todd wraps his arms around Neil.

NEIL

I think I should sleep in your bed tonight. I'll be able to warm up faster, and you won't have to worry about catching cold by sleeping without a blanket.

TODD

Now who's the brilliant one?

NEIL

Nope, that's still you.

TODD

We're both equally brilliant?

NEIL

[chuckling sleepily]

Whatever you say, Todd, as long as I get to go to sleep now.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil are asleep in Todd's bed. Both of them have peaceful looks on their faces. There is a soft knock on the door. Neither Todd or Neil stir-both of them are too asleep to hear the knock. After a few moments there is another knock on the door, louder this time. Todd and Neil both jolt awake, scrambling into action. Neil throws his blanket across his bed to make it look as if he slept in his own bed. Todd moves towards the door and pulls it open. Charlie, Meeks, Pitts, Knox and Cameron stand in the hallway.

CHARLIE

Neil! When did you get back?

NEIL

[yawning]

Like, five hours ago.

MEEKS

What happened?

NEIL

Disowned.

KNOX

Shit...what're you gonna do?

NEIL

Go back to bed, because I'll just do something stupid if I don't get more sleep.

CHARLIE

Do...do you want to talk about it?

PITTS

Yeah, we're here if you want to talk.

Meeks, Knox and Cameron nod in agreement.

NEIL

Thanks, guys, but not right now. I talked to Todd about it last night. Right now I just really want to go back to bed.

CHARLIE

See you at lunch? Todd, want to join us for breakfast?

TODD

I didn't get much sleep last night either. I think I'll go back to bed too...

MEEKS

See you guys later.

Charlie, Pitts, Knox, Cameron, Todd and Neil all nod. Charlie, Pitts, Knox, Cameron and Meeks head off towards breakfast. Neil closes the door, grabs his blanket off of his bed, and joins Todd in Todd's bed where the two of them are asleep instantly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE KEATING'S OFFICE-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil stand in the hallway outside of Mr. Keating's office.

TODD

Go on. I'll be in the library, so come find me when you're done.

Todd starts to walk away.

NEIL

Oh no you don't. You're coming with me.

TODD

Why?

NEIL

[shyly]

I...I don't know...but, please?

TODD

Fine, since you really want me to.

Neil smiles and confidently knocks on Mr. Keating's office door.

MR. KEATING

[from within the room]

Come in!

Neil opens the door and steps into the room. Todd walks into the room behind Neil and closes the door. Mr. Keating, who is sitting at his desk grading papers, looks up when he hears the door close.

MR. KEATING

Neil, wonderful performance. What happened with your father?

NEIL

That's what I wanted to talk about actually.

Mr. Keating gives Todd a questioning looks, which Neil notices.

NEIL

Todd's here for moral support.

Mr. Keating nods.

MR. KEATING

Why don't you sit down?

NEIL AND TODD

Thank you.

Neil and Todd sit down. There is a short silence in which Mr. Keating and Todd both look expectantly at Neil. Neil sighs before speaking.

NEIL

I-I told my father how much acting means to me, after he dragged me home last night. He got mad, really mad. He told me that I had to give up acting, so I told him that I couldn't, because acting is my passion. He...he disowned me. A part of me is really excited that he won't be dictating my life anymore, but the other part is terrified...

Neil's voice trails off. Mr. Keating looks at Neil sympathetically. Todd looks as if he wants to wrap his arms around Neil, but he is also looks scared of how Mr. Keating would respond.

MR. KEATING

How did your mother respond?

NEIL

She...she was really upset. I-I think there's a possibility of her coming around. She didn't say much last night.

MR. KEATING

If I were you, I would give your mother a few days to calm down, and then I would talk to her about it. Call the house when your father is at work, or even go over there if you feel speaking to her in person would be better.

NEIL

Thank you, Captain.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-EARLY EVENING

Todd and Neil are sitting together on Neil's bed, squished together since the bed isn't made to fit two people sitting side by side. Both of them are reading textbooks that sit in their laps. It is quiet until Neil speaks.

NEIL

I listen.

TODD

What?

NEIL

You once said that when you talk people don't listen. But that's not true, because I listen to every word that comes out of your mouth.

TODD

[awestruck]

Neil...

NEIL

Can...can I kiss you?

Todd smiles, blushing slightly. Neil kisses Todd.

TODD

I think I need to change your poem.

NEIL

My poem?

TODD

[blushing]

It's about you. The one I wrote after your performance.

NEIL

Don't blush. You writing a poem about me is adorable.

Todd blushes more.

NEIL

Would kissing you right now make that blush better or worse?

TODD

I-I d-don't k-know. W-why don't y-you k-kiss me a-and see?

Neil chuckles before leaning in to kiss Todd.

TODD

So...does this...does this make us..b-boyfriends?

NEIL

Is that what you want us to be?

TODD

Yes.

NEIL

Good, me too.

Both boys smile.

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM-DAY

The boys sit silently in their seats. Mr. Keating sits at his desk, a somber look on his face.

KEATING

So, finals are quickly approaching.

The boys groan. Keating smiles.

KEATING

Now, in your other classes you will be sitting through grueling exams. But not in here.

The boys perk up.

KEATING

In here, we have already established that poetry and literature are somewhat subjunctive, and therefore cannot be tested. So, instead of taking a test I want you to break into groups of two or three. In these groups you will choose a poem from our textbook and give a dramatic reading. Please use the rest of class to get into groups and discuss which poem you would like to work with.

The boys stare at Mr. Keating in disbelief.

KEATING

Well, go on then.

The boys scramble into action. Todd and Neil make eye contact and smile broadly. Neil moves towards Todd's desk. Charlie and Knox can be seen sitting together, and Pitts and Meeks have their heads bent together, deep in conversation. Mr. Keating walks around the room, making sure everyone has a group. When Mr. Keating reaches Todd and Neil, he pauses.

KEATING

Neil, have you talked to your mother yet?

NEIL

Not yet, Captain. I'm planning on calling her this afternoon.

KEATING

Very good. If you want to talk, you know where to find me.

NEIL

Thank you, Captain.

Mr. Keating turns to Todd.

KEATING

Todd, don't think you're getting away easy by partnering with Neil. He may be an actor, but that doesn't mean you can just let him do all the work.

TODD

Yes, Captain.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are sitting together on Neil's bed, holding hands. One textbook sits across both of their laps, and both of them are reading from it in an attempt to study for an exam.

TODD

Neil?

NEIL

Hm?

TODD

What are you going to do for winter break? You can't go home...

NEIL

[suddenly looking scared]

I...I don't know.

TODD

Do, do you want me to ask my parents if you can come stay with us?

When Neil speaks his voice is unsure.

NEIL

What do you think they'll say?

TODD

I...have no idea. But it doesn't hurt to ask, right? Carpe diem and all of that? And anyway, the break is usually so awful, I really like the idea of having you there to make it more enjoyable.

Todd smiles shyly. Neil smiles broadly.

NEIL

In that case, I would love it if you asked your parents.

Todd closes the textbook, and stands up, pulling Neil with him

TODD

Come on, then. You still have to talk to your mother, too.

Neil, with a terrified look on his face resists Todd's pull towards the door.

NEIL

I don't want to.

TODD

But you have to.

NEIL

Why?

TODD

[his tone slightly harsh]

Don't you want to be on good terms with your mother? Or would you rather be parentless?

NEIL

...what? How...how do you...how do you manage to say things like that without me taking offense?

TODD

It's...it's because I care about you, a lot.

Neil opens his mouth to respond, but is cut off by a knock on the door. Neil squeezes Todd's hand before dropping it.

NEIL

It's open!

The door opens to reveal Mrs. Perry. Neil's eyes open in shock.

NEIL

[mumbling] Fancy that.

[louder] Hello mother. I...I was just about to call you.

Mrs. Perry looks unsurely at Todd. Todd appears uncomfortable, as if he feels like he is imposing.

TODD

I-I'm going to go c-call my parents.

Neil nods as Todd leaves the room. Todd closes the door on his way out.

MRS. PERRY

Neil, darling, I'm here to apologize for the way your father acted the other night.

NEIL

Mother, you don't have to apologize. You, you don't agree with father about my acting, do you?

MRS. PERRY

No, darling, I...it was always your father who wanted you to be a doctor. I want you to be well off enough that you don't have to struggle to make ends meet, but I also want you to be happy. No matter what happens Neil, you'll always be my son. I want what is best for you, and honestly I think the best thing for you to do is to keep your distance from your father and I for a while. The holidays will be very different this year, and as much as it breaks my heart to say this, I think it's what's best for all of us.

Neil has tears in his eyes.

NEIL

Mother...Thank you.

MRS. PERRY

You're welcome, darling. I've talked to your aunt Ida about all of this, and she is very willing to let you stay with her for your break.

NEIL

Oh, I...Todd, well he...he's asking his parents if I can stay with them. Could...could I?

MRS. PERRY

If they'll have you, I don't see why not.

NEIL

[smiling broadly]

Thank you, mother.

Neil hugs his mother. There is a knock on the door.

TODD

[who we hear through the door]

Can...can I come in?

Neil walks over to the door and opens it.

NEIL

You don't have to ask, silly. It's your room too.

TODD

I know, but I didn't want to impose on anything. Sorry, Mrs. Perry.

MRS. PERRY

It's quite alright. Neil and I were just finishing anyway. Neil tells me that your family might be willing to give him a place to stay over the break?

TODD

Yes, ma'am. My-my parents said that Neil is welcome to stay with us.

Todd turns to Neil.

TODD

I-I was vague about the reason you need somewhere to stay. I d-didn't want to tell them what happened without your permission.

NEIL

Thank you.

MRS. PERRY

Tell your parents thank you for me. I appreciate all of this very much.

TODD

Yes ma'am.

MRS. PERRY

Neil darling, good-bye for now. Hopefully by the time summer rolls around, things will have worked themselves out.

NEIL

Yeah. Good-bye, mother.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. STUDY HALL-AFTERNOON

All of the boys sit silently at the tables, textbooks and pages of notes in front of them. Todd, Neil, Charlie, Knox, Meeks, Pitts, and Cameron all sit at a table together. Quite a few boys around the room are having whispered conversations.

MCALLISTER

Quiet down, all of you. You have studying to do.

Silence falls. Boys read from their textbooks, or look over their notes in silence. The bell rings. Textbooks and notebooks are slammed shut, and all of the boys hurry to get out of the room.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-LATE AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil walk into the room, books in their arms. Neil sets his books down on his desk. Todd leans against the door to close it, sighing, his eyes closing in what appears to be defeat. Todd slides down the door until he is sitting on the ground. Neil stands in the middle of the room, watching and looking concerned.

NEIL

Todd?

TODD

[softly]

I'm going to fail everything.

Neil kneels down in front of Todd and takes his hands.

NEIL

No, you're not.

TODD

How do you know?

NEIL

[smiling]

I just do.

TODD

No, you don't. You have no way of knowing if I'll fail or not.

NEIL

Perhaps. But neither do you.

Todd smiles briefly, but then his face falls again.

TODD

But what if I do fail?

NEIL

Todd...don't think like that. You're not going to fail.

TODD

Yeah?

NEIL

Yeah, because I'm going to help you study.

TODD

Neil, you don't need to do that.

NEIL

I know I don't _need_ to, I want to. Besides, helping you study will help _me_ study, so everybody wins.

TODD

[smiling]

What would I ever do without you?

NEIL

Fail, probably.

Todd's smile quickly disappears.

NEIL

I'm kidding, Todd, I'm kidding!

**MONTAGE** INT. VARIOUS PARTS OF WELTON (CLASSROOMS, STUDENT LOUNGE, ETC)-CHANGES IN LIGHTING

We see the Dead Poets, as well as the other students, studying and in various stages of stress in a bunch of different places on the campus of Welton. We move through classrooms where teachers are doing review. We see boys in the student lounge and in the library, hunched over books. We see boys shuffling down the dorm hallway to their rooms. We see Todd and Neil in their room, lit only by their desk lamps due to the midnight darkness seen through the window. All of this is done to show the progression of about a week.

EXT. THE CAVE-AFTERNOON

The Dead Poets are all sitting around the cave, bundled up against the cold.

CAMERON

Is it really wise to be out here having a meeting? Finals are soon, we should be studying.

CHARLIE

Oh, shut up, Cameron, live a little.

KNOX

Yeah, Cameron, you gotta admit, this is better than studying any day.

CAMERON

But exams start tomorrow!

NEIL

Lighten up, Cameron, study breaks are a good thing!

CAMERON

We shouldn't even be here in the first place...

CHARLIE

Oh, for God's sake, just go back and study. If you're going to keep complaining, then we don't want you here.

Cameron shakes his head as he stands, then leaves the cave.

CHARLIE

Well, now that he's gone, should we finally start this meeting?

There is a short montage of the poetry book being passed around in which we hear only one or two lines from each poem. The boys look progressively cold and miserable.

NEIL

I say we call that a day, gents. Any longer out here and my nose will freeze.

Todd mumbles as the Dead Poets get up and move out of the cave.

TODD

Mine's already frozen.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-LATE AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil walk in, both of them shivering.

TODD

[giggling]

Neil, you have snow in your hair.

Todd steps close enough to Neil to brush the snow from Neil's hair. Neil smiles as Todd's hand runs through his hair. Neil gives Todd a quick kiss.

NEIL

Your nose still frozen?

TODD

Yeah...

Neil kisses Todd's nose.

NEIL

That better?

TODD

Mm-hm.

NEIL

So, a bit of last minute studying?

TODD

That'd be good...but I need to warm up first, I don't think I'm going to be able to study productively when I'm this cold.

NEIL

That sounds wonderful.

Both boys take off their coats and shoes.

NEIL

My bed or yours?

TODD

[shyly]

Yours.

Todd and Neil climb into Neil's bed. Todd sits between Neil's legs, his back resting against Neil's chest. Neil wraps his arms around Todd.

NEIL

Relax, Todd, you're much too tense.

TODD

I am relaxed.

NEIL

You're body's so tense, though...

TODD

I know...

Neil unwinds his arms from around Todd. Todd whimpers.

TODD

Hey...put those back. They were warming me up.

Neil starts massaging Todd's shoulders.

TODD

Neil, what're you...oh. Oh.

Neil silently messages Todd's shoulders for a bit.

NEIL

That better?

TODD

Yes. Thank you.

Neil wraps his arms around Todd again, and the two sit in silence.

**MONTAGE** INT. WELTON CLASSROOMS-DAY

We see a montage of the boys taking finals in all of their classes, except English.

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

The boys all sit at their desk. Mr. Keating stands at the front of the room where his desk has been pushes off the side of the room.

KEATING

So, dramatic poetry readings. Who wants to go first?

Neil's hand shoots into the air. Todd notices, and gives Neil a look that seems to say "I hate you. Why are you doing this to me?" Keating looks around the room, no one else has raised their hand.

KEATING

Mr. Perry and Mr. Anderson it is then. Come on up, lads, get us started.

Mr. Keating moves to the side of the room while Todd and Neil move to the front of the room. Todd and Neil look at each other for a few moments before starting to recite a poem in unison. While they recite Neil makes quite a few dramatic gestures and moves around. Todd stays more stationary, and doesn't really move his hands much. You can tell by looking at Todd's face though, that he is really getting into the poem, he just has a different way of showing it than Neil.

TODD AND NEIL

Poets to come! orators, singers, musicians to come!  
Not to-day is to justify me and answer what I am for,  
But you, a new brood, native, athletic, continental, greater than  
before known,  
Arouse! for you must justify me.

I myself but write one or two indicative words for the future,  
I but advance a moment only to wheel and hurry back in the darkness.

I am a man who, sauntering along without fully stopping, turns a  
casual look upon you and then averts his face,  
Leaving it to you to prove and define it,  
Expecting the main things from you.

When Todd and Neil finish reciting the class applauds-the Dead Poets applauding the loudest. Mr. Keating beams proudly. Todd and Neil smile at each other and move back to their seats.

KEATING

Wonderful, boys. Who's next?

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil walk into their room after the end of Keating's class.

NEIL

We were awesome!

TODD

We were, weren't we?


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil stand in the middle of the room. A suitcase sits on both of their beds. The door is open.

TODD

You ready for this?

NEIL

As ready as I'll ever be. It's not weird for me to be nervous about staying with your family, is it?

TODD

Of course not. I think I'd be worried if you _weren't_ nervous.

Neil chuckles. Charlie knocks on the door frame. Todd and Neil both turn towards him as he speaks.

CHARLIE

We're all heading down to wait for our parents to show up. You guys coming?

NEIL

Yeah, we're coming.

INT. WELTON ENTRANCE HALL-MORNING

The Dead Poets are standing in a clump, talking amongst themselves. There are similar clumps of boys around the room. The room slowly empties out as boys get picked up. Cameron gets picked up and the other Dead Poets wave good-bye. Mr. Keating walks through the entrance hall.

KEATING

Have a good holiday, boys.

DEAD POETS

[all smiling]

Happy holidays, Captain!

Todd turns his head towards the door, and his face falls. We see Mr. and Mrs. Anderson walking towards their son.

TODD

[mumbling]

Mother...father...

MRS. ANDERSON

Darling.

MR. ANDERSON

Son.

TODD

T-this...Neil...

NEIL

[brightly]

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Anderson! I'm Neil Perry. Thank you so much for giving me a place to stay over the break.

Neil shakes Mr. and Mrs. Andersons hands politely. The other Dead Poets watch this interaction.

MRS. ANDERSON

We're welcome to help you in your rough time.

MR. ANDERSON

You have a good handshake. You seem like a nice, polite, outgoing young man. I believe having you in the house will be a good influence on Todd.

The Dead Poets look flabbergasted. Neil's smile falters as he looks at Todd. Todd just shakes his head slightly as if to say "Don't bother. Comments like this are normal."

MR. ANDERSON

Well, come on, we haven't got all day. We have to pick Jeffery up from the airport later.

Mrs. Anderson nods and follows Mr. Anderson who is moving towards the door. Todd and Neil pick up their suitcases.

NEIL

Bye, guys!

TODD

Yeah, good-bye.

Todd and Neil hurry to catch up to Mr. and Mrs. Anderson. Charlie, Meeks, Pitts, and Knox all shout their good-byes at Todd and Neil's retreating backs.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. ANDERSON HOUSE-FOYER-AROUND NOON

Todd, Neil, and Mrs. Anderson are standing in the "foyer." Mr. Anderson has walked down a hallway, presumably to his study.

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, darling, why don't you show Neil your room. I've set up an air mattress in there.

TODD

Yes, mother.

Mrs. Anderson moves off down the hallway.

TODD

[sighing]

Well, come on, then.

Todd starts walking. Neil follows. We follow the two up a staircase and down a hallway. Todd stops in front of a closed door. Todd turns the doorknob and opens the door.

TODD

So, this is it.

We scan the room with Neil. It is fairly plain. There is a bed, a desk, a wardrobe and a small bookcase-all of which are plain, somewhat dull colors.

TODD

Sorry it's so boring.

NEIL

No, it's very you.

TODD

So I'm boring?

NEIL

No, far from actually. But, just like the room, all the interesting stuff is under the surface.

TODD

Well, if you say so.

Neil looks down at the air mattress on the floor.

NEIL

Well, I don't think that's going to get much use.

TODD

And why is that?

NEIL

Because I'd rather sleep in your bed with you. Unless you object.

TODD

I'd have to be crazy to object an offer like that.

Neil smiles. There is a knock on the door. Todd opens the door to reveal Mr. Anderson.

MR. ANDERSON

Your mother has made sandwiches. When you're done unpacking you can eat. Your mother and I are going to pick Jeffery from the airport now. We'll be back in a few hours.

TODD

Yes, sir.

Mr. Anderson turns and walks down the hall. Todd closes the door.

NEIL

Well, your parents are...interesting.

TODD

More like awful.

NEIL

Come on, they're not that bad. They let me stay here over break, didn't they?

TODD

That's true.

INT. ANDERSON LIVING ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are sitting on the couch pouring over a book. We can hear the front door open and close.

MRS. ANDERSON

[off-screen]

Todd, darling, come say hello to your brother.

TODD

Yes, mother.

Todd closes the book and stands up. Neil stands up as well. They both walk into to "foyer" where Mr. and Mrs. Anderson, and a man who is in his early twenties, are standing.

JEFFERY

Hello, Todd.

TODD

Hi, Jeffery. This is my roommate, Neil; he'll be staying with us for break.

JEFFERY

Hello.

NEIL

Hello.

Neil and Jeffery shake hands. There is a moment of silent awkwardness until Mr. Anderson speaks.

MR. ANDERSON

Well, I have work to do. I will see you all at dinner.

Mr. Anderson retreats to his study.

JEFFERY

Mother, I'm going to go unpack.

MRS. ANDERSON

Yes, darling.

There is a clear difference in the way that Mrs. Anderson says "darling" when she's speaking to Jeffery, as opposed to when she speaks to Todd.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd storms into his room, Neil close behind him. Neil closes the door.

TODD

[angrily]

I thought me being at Welton was going to make things better!

NEIL

Todd...it's ok.

TODD

[accusingly]

Is it?

NEIL

Maybe not, but it will be, after I do this.

Neil kisses Todd. Todd pulls away.

TODD

What was that for? Kisses can't cure everything!

NEIL

Todd...I'm sorry, I was...trying to help.

TODD

Yeah, well, you didn't.

NEIL

[softly, almost in defeat]

Yeah, I can see that.

TODD

Neil...I-I'm sorry, it's just...spending time around my parents and Jeffery always stresses me out.

INT. ANDERSON DINING ROOM-EVENING

The Andersons and Neil are sitting around the dinner table, eating. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson each sit at an end of the table, Todd and Neil sit next to each other and Jeffery sits across from them.

MR. ANDERSON

So, Neil, what does your father do?

NEIL

He sells car insurance, sir.

MR. ANDERSON

[looking a bit unimpressed]

Very good.

There are a few moments of awkward silence as everyone eats.

MRS. ANDERSON

[to Todd and Neil]

How were your finals, boys?

TODD

[just loud enough to be heard]

Fine, mother.

NEIL

I'm fairly certain they went well. Todd and I are a part of a study group, so we all helped each other be as prepared as possible.

MR. ANDERSON

Jeffery, you weren't in a study group, were you?

JEFFERY

No, sir.

MR. ANDERSON

See, that's the type of man you want to be boys. A man who doesn't need help from anyone else to succeed.

Neil looks like he wants to say something, but realizes it's probably best to stay quiet. There is more awkward silence as they finish their meal.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil walk into the room, clearly having just finished dinner.

NEIL

Please tell me I'm having some crazy dream right now, and that you father did not just say _that_.

Neil spits out the last word, obviously very upset. Todd seems surprisingly unflustered.

TODD

[very matter-of-factly, although there is a slight hint of sadness]

He did.

Neil sputters for a few moments, unable to find words.

NEIL

How...you...how do you manage to live with these people?

Todd shrugs.

TODD

Learn to make do, I guess.

Neil looks at Todd in awe for a moment before speaking.

NEIL

You're a lot stronger than I thought.

TODD

What?

NEIL

When I first met you...you were this...shy, meek guy, and I thought, you know, that you weren't very strong, and I was pretty much okay with that. But then out of nowhere you'll just come out and do something and I'll find myself thinking _holy crap Todd is so much stronger than he seems_. And...and in that one simple sentence I-I was reminded how strong you are.

Todd checks to make sure that door is closed, and then launches himself at Neil. Todd engulfs Neil in a bone crushing hug. Todd's head is on Neil's shoulder, so when Todd speaks, his voice is muffled in Neil's neck.

TODD

No one has ever called me strong before.

NEIL

So, what's my prize?

TODD

This...

Todd gives Neil a kiss.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-VERY LATE AT NIGHT

The room is dark. Both Todd and Neil lay in Todd's bed.

NEIL

[his voice soft]

I still need to do some Christmas shopping.

TODD

[his voice just as soft, if not softer, than Neil's]

Me too. There are some shops we can walk to. If we're lucky my father might let me borrow the car, but I wouldn't bet on it.

NEIL

Mm...okay.

Neil yawns.

NEIL

Can we go to sleep now?

When Todd speaks you can hear the smirk that has spread across his face.

TODD

No.

NEIL

[sleepily]

Shut up, Todd, I'm trying to sleep.

TODD

No.

NEIL

Seriously, Todd, be quiet. Silent actually. I don't know what's gotten into you, you used to be awesome at that.

TODD

[jokingly]

Is that so?

NEIL

Yeah. You are the real Todd, right? You're not some alien who's taken over my boyfriend?

TODD

Would I tell you the truth if I _was_ an alien?

NEIL

Stop being so brilliant and go to sleep.

TODD

Okay, okay. Good night, Neil.

NEIL

Good night, Todd.

EXT. THE SNOWY STREETS OF A NEIGHBORHOOD-LATE MORNING/EARLY AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are walking, bundled up against the cold.

NEIL

I can't believe he wouldn't let you use the car! It's not like he was using it!

TODD

Yeah, well, can you really say you're surprised?

NEIL

No, but it's still unfair.

TODD

Maybe...but that's my dad for you.

Todd and Neil continue walking in silence.

EXT. STREET LINED WITH SHOPS-EARLY AFTERNOON

TODD

Bookstore?

NEIL

Bookstore.

Todd and Neil walk into the bookstore halfway down the block.

INT. BOOKSTORE-EARLY AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil look around, wondering where to begin.

NEIL

Don't look now, I want your present to be a surprise.

TODD

Good. I want yours to a surprise too.

Todd and Neil move off in different directions.

INT. ANDERSON HOUSE-FOYER-LATE AFTERNOON/EARLY EVENING

Todd and Neil walk in through the front door, both of them shedding layers-coats, scarves, gloves and hats.

MRS. ANDERSON

[off screen]

Todd, is that you?

TODD

Yes, mother.

MRS. ANDERSON

You two need to wash up; dinner is almost ready.

TODD

Yes, mother.

INT. ANDERSON DINING ROOM-EVENING

The Andersons and Neil sit around the dinner table again, in the same seats they were in last time.

MRS. ANDERSON

Neil, I don't know if Todd has mentioned it, but every year we host a Christmas party on Christmas Eve.

Neil gives Todd a quizzical look.

NEIL

No, he hadn't. I do enjoy a good party.

MRS. ANDERSON.

Yes, well. Everyone has chores to do to prepare the house. You wouldn't mind helping, would you?

NEIL

No, of course not.

**MONTAGE** INT. ANDERSON HOUSE-VARIOUS ROOMS-VARIOUS PARTS OF DAY

Todd and Neil can be seen around the house doing various chores. Occasionally we see Jeffery or Mr. or Mrs. Anderson. Days pass.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD'S ROOM-LATE AFTERNOON.

Todd and Neil are curled up together on Todd's bed.

NEIL

[contently]

How much time do we have?

Todd looks at his watch.

TODD

About half an hour until people start showing up. But if we're not dressed presentably and downstairs in ten my mom will flip out.

NEIL

I suppose we better get ready then, huh.

TODD

[snuggling closer to Neil]

Five more minutes.

NEIL

Sounds good to me.

Todd and Neil cuddle closer together, both looking content. After a few moments of a comfortable silence Todd looks at his watch again.

TODD

Come on, we better get ready.

NEIL

If you say so.

Todd and Neil get up reluctantly. Both boys move over to Todd's wardrobe, where both of their clothes are stored. We transition into seeing Todd and Neil in nice suits.

TODD

Y-you l-look nice.

NEIL

You look nice too. But why are you so shy all of a sudden? I thought we'd gotten past that.

TODD

[blushing slightly]

I-I don't know.

NEIL

Come here, you.

Todd steps into Neil's open arms.

INT. ANDERSON LIVING ROOM-EVENING

The Christmas party is in full swing. Well dressed men and women are standing around, glasses of wine in their hands. The occasional teenager stand here and there, although it is clear most of them don't want to be there. Todd and Neil stand off to one side of the room. Both of them have drinks in their hands-soda or something. Mrs. Anderson walks over, a teenage girl a few steps behind her. The girls is very pretty with long red hair and blue eyes.

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, darling, have you said hello to Olivia yet? You haven't seen her since last year's party.

OLIVIA

Hello, Todd.

TODD

Hello, Olivia. This is Neil.

NEIL

Hello, Olivia, nice to meet you.

OLIVIA

Nice to meet you, Neil.

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, you should take Olivia out sometime, you two would be a lovely couple. Don't you agree, Neil?

Neil, who has just taken a sip of his drink, starts to choke. Todd, almost absentmindedly, thumps Neil on the back a few times.

NEIL

Oh, um...yes. Lovely couple they would make.

MRS. ANDERSON

Yes. Well, I'll leave you all to talk about whatever you teenagers talk about.

Mrs. Anderson walks off. Todd, Neil, and Olivia all stand awkwardly for a few moments.

OLIVIA

You don't have to ask me out, you know. I have a boyfriend, but your mother wouldn't listen when I tried to explain.

TODD

Oh, well, that's a relief...wait, I mean, it's just...

OLIVA

That we only ever see each other at this Christmas party? Yeah. Relax, Todd, I understand.

TODD

Ok, yeah, good.

OLIVIA

So, how do you guys know each other?

NEIL

We're roommates at Welton.

OLIVIA

Oh, I see. So you finally made your way to Welton, huh Todd.

TODD

Yep.

NEIL

So, Olivia, what are you into?

OLIVIA

I draw.

NEIL

Cool!

OLIVIA

Um-hm. What about you?

NEIL

I act.

OLIVIA

Oh, cool! Wait, were you Puck in Henley Hall's production of A Midsummer's Night Dream?

NEIL

Yeah!

OLIVIA

I thought you looked familiar! My cousin goes to Henley Hall, and she dragged me to the show.

NEIL

Did you enjoy it?

OLIVIA

Very much! You were wonderful.

NEIL

Thank you! Todd here writes really good poetry.

OLVIA

Really? I didn't know you're a writer, Todd.

TODD

[bashfully]

It's kind of a new thing.

There are a few moments of slightly awkward silence.

OLIVIA

Well, I guess I'll leave you two be. It was nice talking to again, Todd. Nice meeting you, Neil.

NEIL

Nice to meet you.

TODD

Bye.

**MONTAGE**

We see Todd talking to quite a few girls, all at his parents request. During all of these conversations it is clear that Todd wishes he were about anywhere else. We keep seeing Todd give Neil looks that say "I'm sorry about all of this." Neil returns those looks with looks that say "I know this sucks, but it'll all be over soon."

INT. TODD'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd is sprawled face down on his bed. Neil is closing the door.

TODD

[muffled by the bed]

Thank god that's over.

NEIL

Oh, I don't know. I didn't mind the excuse to stare at my handsome boyfriend in a handsome suit.

Todd sits up and stares at Neil, wide eyed.

TODD

Did...did you really stare at me? Didn't people notice?

NEIL

Oh, I stared all right. And nobody noticed, I made sure of that.

TODD

I..I'm sorry.

NEIL

For what, silly?

TODD

Not using the party as an excuse to stare at _my_ handsome boyfriend in his fancy suit.

NEIL

Todd, it's not a problem. You had plenty of pretty girls you needed to stare at instead.

TODD

There is no _instead_ when it comes to you, Neil. I didn't want to spend all my time talking to those girls, you know that right? It's just...my parents...they don't know I don't like girls in that way, hell _I_ didn't even really know until I met you.

The longer Todd speaks, the more visibly upset he becomes.

TODD

And I just feel really guilty, spending most of the party talking to girls when I should have been talking to you.

NEIL

Todd, Todd, it's okay. I know you're not attracted to those girls at all...are you?

TODD

No, Neil, not at all. I'm attracted to _you_.

NEIL

Oh yea?

TODD

Yeah.

NEIL

Prove it.

Todd kisses Neil.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil are snuggled in Todd's bed. The light is off, so we can barely make out their bodies. Moonlight shines in through the window, lighting up the room slightly.

NEIL

[excitedly]

Tomorrow is Christmas!

TODD

Yes Neil, tomorrow is Christmas.

NEIL

[bouncing]

I'm excited, aren't you excited?

TODD

[chuckling]

You're like an overgrown child.

NEIL

So?

TODD

Nothing, I was just observing.

NEIL

Ok. But I'm so excited, aren't you?

TODD

I'm more excited about sleeping.

NEIL

What?

TODD

Christmas is never really a big deal around here.

NEIL

Oh. It was never really a big deal at my house either. Let's promise each other something. Let's _make it_ a big deal.

TODD

[sleepily]

Ok.

NEIL

Good night, Todd.

TODD

Good night, Neil.


	9. Chapter 9

******Later today I am leaving to spend some time in a place that doesn't have internet, so I will not be able to update until I get back, which will be sometime on Friday. Sorry!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD'S ROOM-VERY EARLY MORNING

The clock on Todd's bedside table reads six o'clock. The sun hasn't even begun to rise. Neil is sitting on Todd's bed, bouncing. Todd is curled up on his side, still fast asleep.

NEIL

[still bouncing]

Todd...Todd...wake up. Wake up, Todd, wake up!

TODD

[groaning, his eyes still closed]

Neil, you know the bathroom's down the hall. You don't have to wake me up to tell me you're going.

NEIL

[giggling]

No, Todd, it's not that. Come on, wake up!

TODD

Why?

NEIL

Because it's Christmas!

Todd looks at the clock.

TODD

It's also six o'clock in the morning.

NEIL

[excitedly]

So?

TODD

So, I want to go back to sleep.

NEIL

But I want to go open presents!

TODD

You can snuggle with me if we go back to sleep.

NEIL

Damn, you know just how to get to me.

Todd and Neil snuggle together. The lighting slowly brightens as the sun rises. When the clock reads eight o'clock Neil begins to stir again.

NEIL

Can we get up now?

TODD

I suppose so.

INT. ANDERSON LIVING ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil walk into the living room where Mr. Anderson, Mrs. Anderson and Jeffery are sitting, talking. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson and Jeffery are all dressed. Todd and Neil are still in their pajamas. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson and Jeffery all look up when Neil and Todd walk in.

MRS. ANDERSON

There you are, I was just about to come wake you. Todd, darling, did you honestly not have enough sense to fix that bed head before coming out here?

Todd's hands shoot up to his head. He tries to fix his messy hair, but it doesn't work.

MRS. ANDERSON

In fact, why don't you two go get dressed, make yourselves presentable. And then we'll open gifts.

TODD

Yes, mother.

Todd and Neil walk out of the room.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil are both finishing "making themselves presentable."

TODD

You ready?

NEIL

Almost. I just have to do one more thing.

Todd looks Neil up and down. Neil appears to be ready.

TODD

Yeah, and what is that?

NEIL

Give you a Christmas kiss.

TODD

Is there even such a thing?

NEIL

There is now.

Todd chuckles. Todd's chuckle is silenced by Neil kissing him. There is a knock on the door. Todd and Neil break apart, looking themselves over-checking for winkles and such.

MRS. ANDERSON

[through the door]

Todd, darling, are the two of you almost ready? Your father and brother are getting hungry, and would like to start breakfast.

TODD

We're coming!

INT. ANDERSON KITCHEN-MORNING

Mr. and Mrs. Anderson are all sitting around the kitchen table, plates of breakfast sitting in front of them. There are two plates-already served with food-sitting on the table-presumably for Todd and Neil.

MRS. ANDERSON

That's better, dears. Sit down so we can eat.

Todd and Neil sit down. Everyone begins eating.

INT. ANDERSON LIVING ROOM-MORNING

Mr. Anderson sits in an armchair, Mrs. Anderson and Jeffery sit on the couch, and Todd and Neil sit on the floor, not too far from the tree. There is already some wrapping paper sitting on the ground in a neat pile, and gifts scattered a few places, so it is clear that some gifts have already been opened.

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, dear, that blue one there, is for you. From your father and I.

JEFFERY

It's from me too.

MR. ANDERSON

Yes, your brother helped us picking it out.

Todd reaches for the gift and mumbles a thank you. Todd pulls back the wrapping paper to reveal two plain covered books with generic, un-descriptive titles.

TODD

[looking around at his parents and his brother]

Thank you.

MRS. ANDERSON

You're welcome, darling. Your brother quite enjoyed those books when he was your age, so you should enjoy them as well.

JEFFERY

Yes, share them with Neil. I'm sure he'll enjoy them as well.

Todd and Neil both nod politely. Neil leans towards Todd and whispers.

NEIL

You wanna get out of here? We can exchange gifts in your room-get away from this awkwardness.

Todd nods in response to Neil. Todd and Neil both stand up and leave the room. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson and Jeffery don't notice.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-LATE MORNING

Todd and Neil sit on Todd's bed, both cross legged and facing each other. They both have a wrapped gift in their lap.

NEIL

You go first.

TODD

No, you go first.

NEIL

No, really, you go fist.

TODD

At the same time?

NEIL

[chuckling]

You and your brilliance, here to save the day once again.

Todd blushes as the two exchange the gifts they're holding. They look at each other, and then both start to pull back the wrapping. Before either of them get very far Neil speaks.

NEIL

Wait, wait, wait.

Todd pauses mid opening gift.

NEIL

I want to see your reaction when you open it.

TODD

I want to see your reaction too.

They stare at each other, silently communicating.

TODD

Fine, I'll go first.

Neil smiles, and sets his gift aside. Todd tears away the wrapping to reveal a nice notebook with a very nice cover and a very fancy looking pen. There is a note card that states "for your poetry"

NEIL

Poetry as good as yours deserves to be written in something as equally beautiful.

Todd looks up at Neil, his eyes slightly watery. When he speaks his voice is barely above a whisper, although there is love dripping off of every word.

TODD

Thank you.

Neil reaches to wipe away the single tear that has leaked out of Todd's eyes. When Neil speaks his voice is just as soft, and just as filled with love as Todd's.

NEIL

Hey, don't cry.

Todd tries to stop himself from letting any more tears fall.

TODD

It's just...that was the sweetest thing anybody has ever said to me.

Neil smiles and kisses Todd tenderly. After a few moments Todd pushes Neil away gently.

TODD

[giggling]

You still have to open your gift silly.

NEIL

[almost as if he had forgotten about his present-and Christmas-completely]

Oh yea!

Neil picks up his gift and tears at the wrapping like a little child. Soon there is shredded wrapping paper all over Todd's bed and the surrounding floor, and a book in Neil's lap. The words "The Illustrated William Shakespeare classic-A Midsummer's Night Dream" are across the cover of the book in gold writing. The cover has a very nice illustration of the story inside.

TODD

I mean, I know you probably have most of it memorized already, but...

NEIL

Todd, stop, it's perfect.

TODD

Really?

NEIL

Really, but not as perfect as you.

TODD

You're so cheesy.

NEIL

But you love it.

TODD

[chuckling]

Yes, I do.

NEIL

Hey! Do you wanna go play in the snow?

Todd nods excitedly.

EXT. THE ANDERSON'S BACKYARD-LATE MORNING

Todd and Neil stand just outside the back door. Both of them are wearing many layers-bundled up against the cold. They are both just standing on the stoop-looking out at the undisturbed snow. Suddenly Neil scoops up a handful of snow, and launches it at Todd.

TODD

Hey!

NEIL

[laughing]

I had to start the fun somehow!

Todd laughs, then throws a snowball at Neil. Neil runs off into the back yard, Todd following closely behind him. They throw snowballs at each other for a while before moving on to building a snowman. Todd and Neil are laying in the snow making snow angels when the back door opens and Mrs. Anderson is standing there.

MRS. ANDERSON

Come inside and get out of those wet clothes, dears, it's time for lunch.

TODD

Yes, mother.

NEIL

Yes, ma'am.

INT. ANDERSON KITCHEN-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are sitting at the table, having just finished their lunches. Mrs. Anderson is moving around the kitchen, putting some freshly baked cookies on a plate. Mr. Anderson and Jeffery are nowhere to be seen. Todd and Neil are both shivering slightly, still cold from their time in the snow.

MRS. ANDERSON

Should I make you boys some hot coco to warm you up?

NEIL

That would be nice, thank you.

Todd and Neil sit in silence as Mrs. Anderson makes the hot coco. The way they are looking at each other makes it seem as if they are having a silent conversation, although there is no way of telling what they're communicating about. Mrs. Anderson finishes making the hot coco and sits a mug down in front of each boy. The look on her face is almost mother-ish, although it is clear it is forced.

TODD

Mother, can we take these to my room?

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, you know we have rules against food in the bedrooms.

NEIL

Please, Mrs. Anderson? We promise we'll be careful.

MRS. ANDERSON

[a pained expression on her face]

Well, I suppose so. But be extra careful, boys, I don't want to find stains on anything.

NEIL

Of course not, Mrs. Anderson. We'll be super careful, I promise.

TODD

Thank you, mother.

MRS. ANDERSON

Todd, take some cookies to your father on the way. Go ahead and take that whole plate, I have more coming out of the oven.

TODD

Yes, mother.

Todd and Neil stand up, each picking up their mugs of hot cocoa, Todd also picking up the plate of cookies on the table. When the two are out of sight and earshot of the kitchen, Todd urges Neil to take some cookies.

TODD

Take some cookies and go back to the room. I'll meet you there after I deliver these to my father.

Neil takes some cookies and the two head separate ways.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are cuddling in Todd's bed. Todd is curled up in Neil's arms. There is a content, almost sleepy look on both of their faces. Neil kisses Todd.

NEIL

Mmm...you taste like hot cocoa.

TODD

[giggling]

You taste like it too.

NEIL

I rather like it. This whole tasting chocolate when we kiss thing. Perhaps I should just eat chocolate right before I kiss you from now on.

TODD

[groaning, although obviously not mad]

Neil...I'm never going to be able to look at chocolate the same way again.

NEIL

[smiling smugly]

Good.

INT. TODD'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil both sit on the bed, looking at the clock, which reads 11:59 pm. When the clock hits midnight Todd and Neil turn to face each other, both of them smiling.

NEIL

Happy New Year, Todd.

TODD

Happy New Year, Neil.

They kiss.

**Again, I will not be able to update again until Friday, as I will not have internet until then.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Update:Turns_ out I will be able to get on the internet while I'm here, in this previously internetless place, so the updates will keep coming on a daily basis._**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM AT WELTON-EARLY AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are moving around the room, finishing unpacking.

NEIL

Let's go see who else is back!

TODD

Okay.

Todd and Neil walk out of their room, expecting to have to knock on the doors of the other Dead Poets. However, the other Dead Poets are already standing in the hallway. The faces of all the boys light up when they see each other.

CHARLIE

Neil! Todd!

NEIL

Guys!

MEEKS

Hello!

PITTS

Hi!

TODD

Hey!

KNOX

Hiya!

CAMERON

Hello.

NEIL

Meeting tonight?

CHARLIE

Yes!

KNOX

Wonderful.

MEEKS

Cool.

PITTS

Awesome.

CAMERON

Alright.

TODD

Can't wait.

EXT. OLD INDIAN CAVE-NIGHT

The Dead Poets are all sitting around the cave. The poetry book sits in Todd's lap, forgotten. The Dead Poets are exchanging stories about their winter breaks.

**MONTAGE** we hear just snippets of stories from all of the Dead Poets.

CHARLIE

...and then my uncle got drunk like he does every year...

PITTS

...my three year old cousin tried to climb me, because she thought I was a tree...

CAMERON

...I had some fascinating conversations with my great uncle about business practices...

KNOX

...I contemplated finding my way to Chris' house to surprise her, but that didn't really work out...

MEEKS

...My great aunt spent all of Christmas dinner talking loudly about zoos...

TODD

...Neil hit me with snowballs...

NEIL

...Jeffery isn't what I expected him to be, I honestly don't know why we all looked up to him when we started here and he was a senior...

CAMERON

...my baby cousin spit up on me...

PITTS

...I got stuck decorating the tree since apparently I'm the only one tall enough to reach the top of the tree...

CHARLIE

...snuck some of my parent's alcohol...

MEEKS

...came up with an idea for a way to improve our radio, Pitts...

KNOX

...my cousins thought I was making Chris up, and then teased me because they think she has a boy's name...

NEIL

...I rarely ever saw Todd's father, he's like a hermit or something...

TODD

...yeah, a work addicted, bite-your-head-off-if-you-so-much-as-say-the-wrong-thing hermit...

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

It is the first day back in classes after break. Class has just ended. The boys are packing their books up, and heading out of the room.

KEATING

Mr. Anderson, if you'd be so kind as to hang back for a moment.

TODD

Yes, Captain.

Neil hesitates in the doorway.

KEATING

Go on, Mr. Perry, your Walt Whitman will be along in a minute.

Neil walks out of the room, a confused look on his face. Todd looks very nervous.

KEATING

Relax, Todd, you've done nothing wrong. I merely wanted to recommend a book to you.

TODD

Oh...okay.

KEATING

It's called Diffracting Darkness. I know for a fact that it's not in the library here, but I believe there is a copy at the public library. It's about Walt Whitman, both a short biography and a collection of some of his work. I think you'll find it quite interesting, and you might even find some things in there that you relate to.

TODD

Thank you, Captain.

KEATING

You're welcome, Todd. Now run along to class, I don't want to be responsible for you being late.

TODD

Yes, Captain.

INT. CHEMISTRY CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

The chemistry teacher is lecturing at the front of the room. Todd slips into the classroom and manages to sit down in his seat without being noticed. Todd is opening is his chemistry notebook when Neil, who sits next to Todd, leans over and whispered conversation.

NEIL

Nice ninja skills.

TODD

Thanks.

NEIL

What did Keating want?

TODD

I'll tell you after class.

Neil nods and both boys turn their attention to the teacher.

INT. STUDENT LOUNGE-EVENING

The Dead Poets are sitting around a table-textbooks and notebooks open in front of all of them.

CHARLIE

[groaning]

God...can't it be summer already?

MEEKS

Come on, Charlie, we just got back from winter break.

CHARLIE

Yeah, well, you actually enjoy studying.

MEEKS

Learning is fun! You should try to enjoy it more.

Charlie opens his mouth to argue back but Neil cuts him off.

NEIL

Come on guys, don't argue. We've got homework to do!

Meeks turns back to his work happily. Charlie groans, but turns back to his work as well. The boys all work silently for a bit. Todd seems a bit distracted.

NEIL

Todd, you okay?

TODD

Yeah, why?

NEIL

You just seem a bit distracted.

TODD

Nah, just thinking. Can I see your chemistry notes, since I missed the beginning of class?

NEIL

Of course.

Neil shuffles through his notes before finding his chemistry notes from that day.

TODD

Thanks.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil are both moving around the room, getting ready for bed.

TODD

[bashfully]

Can...can we share a bed tonight? I got so used to it over break, and I missed it last night...

NEIL

[snarkily]

Oh, I don't know...how much do you want it?

TODD

A lot. I like being able to cuddle with you, to be able to touch you. Not in any sort of sexual way, of course, but when I wake up in the middle of the night and your body is just _there_, I...well...it just makes me feel less alone.

NEIL

Well _shit_...I'd have to be the world's biggest idiot to say no to that.

INT. DINING HALL-MORNING

The Dead Poets are all sitting together, eating breakfast. The dining hall is filled with the noise of conversations of all the boys gathered there.

TODD

How do you get to the public library from here?

PITTS

Why do you need to know?

TODD

Mr. Keating recommended a book to me that's not in the library here.

NEIL

I'll show you where it is. It'll be nice to get off campus for a bit, even if we did just get back.

TODD

Okay.

NEIL

You want to go today after classes are done?

TODD

Sure.

NEIL

Great.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE PUBLIC LIBRARY-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are outside the public library, which has big windows. Through these windows we can see Mr. Perry, who does not seem to have noticed Neil and Todd.

NEIL

Shit...what is my father doing at the library? I can't go in there now!

TODD

We can come back...

NEIL

No, it's ok. I-I'll just meet you at the candy store down the street. You won't be that long, right?

TODD

I'll be quick. I'll see you soon.

Todd and Neil go separate ways.

INT. PUBLIC LIBRARY-AFTERNOON

Todd is walking towards the desk to check out his book when he passes a stack of fliers on a table. "Poetry Reading" is printed across the top of the fliers. There is smaller writing under that which is harder to make out. Todd looks around, almost as if he's scared of someone seeing him looking at the fliers. He grabs one and stuffs it in his pocket.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are sitting on Neil's bed, kissing.

NEIL

You know, I feel bad for everyone else here. All those teenage hormones and no way to deal with them.

Todd scooches away from Neil. When Todd speaks he sounds offended and hurt.

TODD

Is that what all of this is to you? A way to deal with your hormones?

NEIL

Todd...no, of course not.

TODD

Please, just tell me the truth. I-if that's all this is for you than I need you to tell me, so I don't get my hopes up thinking that this is something it's not.

NEIL

Todd, I...I l-love you.

TODD

Neil...

NEIL

I know it's ridiculous for me to say that, I mean, we're only sixteen! But I do, Todd, I love you.

TODD

Neil...I...I don't even...

NEIL

[dejectedly]

It's ok, you don't have to say it back. Not if you don't feel the same way.

Neil hangs his head, refusing to look at Todd.

TODD

But I do, Neil, I do feel the same way.

Neil's head shoots up, his eyes searching Todd's face.

NEIL

You do?

Todd nods.

NEIL

Can...can you...?

TODD

I love you.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

**MONTAGE **INT. VARIOUS PARTS OF WELTON (CLASSROOMS, STUDENT LOUNGE, ETC)-CHANGES IN LIGHTING

We see the Dead Poets in various parts of their day. In classes, studying in the lounge, having Dead Poet Society meetings. We see Todd and Neil in their room, sometimes reading, sometimes kissing. We see Neil reading the copy of A Midsummer's Night Dream Todd gave him for Christmas. We see Todd writing poetry in his notebook from Neil, using the pen Neil gave him. Numerous times we see Todd looking at the flier for the poetry reading-his face is always twisted with intense thought.

EXT. OLD INDIAN CAVE-AFTERNOON

The Dead Poets are having a meeting. There is a lull in the meeting. The Dead Poets seem more interested in relaxing than having a meeting. Todd has pulled out his poetry notebook and started writing. The poetry reading flier, which is on a bright piece of paper is sticking out of Todd's notebook. Neil notices the flier and makes a grab for it.

NEIL

Todd, what is this?

Todd frantically tries to get the piece of paper back from Neil. Neil is now reading the flier.

TODD

Give it...Neil, give it back!

NEIL

A poetry reading? Todd's going to be in a poetry reading!

TODD

Come on, Neil...no I'm not...

NEIL

Then why do you have this flier, huh?

TODD

...I...I t-thought ab-about it...but I don't think I'm actually going to do it.

NEIL

Why not?

CHARLIE

Wait...hold up...since when does Todd write poetry?

NEIL

Couple months.

TODD

[mumbling]

Longer than that.

There are a few moments of silence.

NEIL

[hopeful, but knowing that he shouldn't be]

So...are you gonna do it?

The other Dead Poets are nodding, encouraging Todd to say yes.

TODD

No.

NEIL

Please...for me?

Todd stand up, notebook and pen in hand, outraged. He grabs the flier back from Neil.

TODD

WHY IS EVERYTHING ALWAYS ABOUT YOU? WHY CAN'T IT BE ABOUT ME EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE!

Todd storms out of the cave. The other Dead Poets sit, shocked.

PITTS

Todd can yell?

MEEKS

Apparently...

CHARLIE

Well, that was unexpected.

NEIL

Shit, guys...I'm going after him.

Neil stands up and follows Todd.


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd is sitting on his bed, his head hanging. We can hear him sniffling, and his body is shaking slightly. It is clear that he is crying. Neil bursts through the door in a panic. Todd does not look up, even as the door bangs against the wall.

NEIL

Todd...I...

TODD

[sniffling]

I know what you're going to say. You're going to tell me that it isn't all about you, and that it's about me plenty. But it's not Neil, it's not. And most of the time I'm okay with that, but...but sometimes I _want_ to be in the spotlight, because I wonder what it's like. Sometimes I want people to listen to every word I say, pay attention to everything I do. _Care_ about it all. But then I get scared, and I don't let people do any of those things, because if you don't put yourself out there, than they can't ignore you and make you feel like crap.

NEIL

[dumbstruck]

Shit, Todd...I had no idea you feel that way. And I...I don't know what to say or do to make it better.

TODD

[sniffling-louder than before]

You can...I think I'd like to be alone right now.

NEIL

[softly]

Okay.

Neil backs out of the room.

INT. DINING HALL-EVENING

The Dead Poets are sitting together, eating dinner. Todd is absent, and Neil, who looks defeated, is much quieter than normal.

PITTS

Where's Todd?

NEIL

[shrugging]

Our room, probably.

MEEKS

Is he okay?

NEIL

Um-hm. He just wants to think things through.

KNOX

So...what exactly is the matter?

NEIL

I...I don't know. I don't think he really knows either. I'm just gonna let him figure it out.

CHARLIE

But don't you think he'd appreciate someone to talk to about it?

NEIL

I already tried that. He asked me to leave him alone.

PITTS

He kicked you out of your room?

NEIL

Yeah, I guess you could say that.

CHARLIE

Well, shit. If Todd's yelling and kicking people out of rooms, who knows what'll happen next.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-EVENING

Todd is sitting on his bed, reading the book he checked out from the library. He is no longer crying, but it is clear that he is still upset, although in that weird calmed state that sometimes comes about after crying for a long time. Neil pushes open the door hesitantly.

NEIL

Can...am I allowed to come in now?

Todd nods, not looking up from his book.

NEIL

I brought you some food, since you missed dinner.

Todd doesn't say anything.

NEIL

Todd...you can't just ignore me.

Todd turns a page in his book, silent.

NEIL

Okay, okay, I guess you can. I'll just leave the food on your desk.

Neil sets the plate of food on Todd desk. He then sits down on his own bed and starts working on his homework.

The lighting changes-indicating the passing of a few hours.

TODD

[his voice sounding completely normal-as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened earlier that day. He does not look up from his book when he speaks]

Did you know that Walt Whitman was a homosexual?

Neil looks very surprised to hear Todd's voice so out of the blue.

NEIL

What?

TODD

[still looking down at the book]

Yeah. He's kind of my hero now.

NEIL

Is he, now?

TODD

Mm-hm. I mean, he's a homosexual poet. How could I not look up to him?

Todd finally looks up at Neil at this point. His eyes are now sparkling from happiness and not tears.

NEIL

[jokingly]

Even though you called him a sweaty-toothed madman.

Todd's face falls.

NEIL

Todd...I'm sorry, I didn't mean it.

TODD

Then why did you say it?

NEIL

I...I guess I was trying to cheer you up.

TODD

It didn't work.

NEIL

I realize that.

TODD

Can I go back to reading now?

NEIL

Whatever you want, Todd.

There are a few moments of silence until Neil speaks again.

NEIL

No, wait, I want to talk about what happened earlier.

TODD

I don't.

NEIL

I really think we should.

TODD

And I think that's a stupid idea.

NEIL

Well, you should eat at any rate.

Todd looks back and forth between the food on his desk and Neil a few times.

TODD

Fine.

Todd and Neil sleep in their own beds that night.


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

**MONTAGE **INT. VARIOUS PARTS OF WELTON (CLASSROOMS, STUDENT LOUNGE, ETC)-CHANGES IN LIGHTING

We see the Dead Poets in various parts of their day to show the passage of a few days. Everything we see makes it clear that Todd and Neil are at odds with each other. It is very clear that they haven't talked at all about Todd's outburst. The other Dead Poets seem to be taking their lead and not bringing it up. Todd and Neil haven't even touched in days.

INT. HALLWAY JUST OUTSIDE THE CHEMISTRY CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

Chemistry class has just finished and the boys are all moving off down the hallway, excited to be done with classes for the day. Neil hangs back slightly.

NEIL

Hey, Todd, hold up a minute.

Todd looks confused, but hangs back none the less. Todd looks at Neil quizzically.

TODD

So?

NEIL

[nervously]

Have...have you thought about the poetry reading anymore?

TODD

Will you just give it up?

NEIL

No.

TODD

Neil...

KEATING

[off screen-down the hallway]

Everything alright, boys?

Todd and Neil both look towards Mr. Keating, who we can now see.

TODD

Yes, Captain, everything's alright.

NEIL

No, Todd, everything is not "alright."

KEATING

Why don't you boys come with me to my office, and we'll talk thing problem out, okay?

TODD AND NEIL

Yes, Captain.

INT. KEATING'S OFFICE-AFTERNOON

Mr. Keating, Todd and Neil all sit-Todd and Neil next to each other with Mr. Keating facing them.

KEATING

So, boys, what seems to be the problem?

Todd and Neil look at each other, trying to figure out who is going to explain. Neither speaks.

KEATING

Todd, why don't you explain your side of whatever this is.

Todd sighs before starting to speak.

TODD

I was at the public library, getting that book you told me about, and I saw a flier for this poetry reading that's going to be held early next month, where anyone can sign up to perform. I took one, because I thought I _might_ want to do it. I-I didn't tell anybody about it, but Neil found the flier. He p-pressured me to do it, a-and I didn't like that. So I got mad.

KEATING

Ah...Neil?

NEIL

When I found the flier, I got really excited, because Todd's poetry was brilliant that one day in class, and I know he's been spending a lot of time writing. He won't ever share any of it, so I was excited at the possibility of getting to find out what he's been writing, to hear him read it. But then he got mad, and I didn't know what to do to make him un-mad, and...yeah.

KEATING

Well, this is a bit of a predicament, isn't it? Todd, have you made your decision about the poetry reading yet?

TODD

No, I'm still thinking.

NEIL

[angrily]

You told me you weren't going to do it!

TODD

I never said that!

KEATING

Boys, boys, boys. There's no need to yell.

Todd and Neil fall silent, but they refuse to look at each other.

KEATING

Now then, how should we go about solving this?

TODD

I-I just want an apology.

NEIL

Todd...I'm sorry, I really am. I've been trying to say it for days.

TODD

I'm sorry for yelling at you.

NEIL

Don't be silly. I provoked you, you had every reason to yell.

TODD

Can...can you just let me say I'm sorry? It'll make me feel better.

NEIL

Apology accepted.

Todd and Neil both stare at each other for a moment before simultaneously standing up and embracing each other in a tight hug. Mr. Keating sits with a bemused look on his face. Todd and Neil prolong the hug for quite a while, and Mr. Keating eventually gets up and moves deeper into his office.

KEATING

Carry on, boys. Do whatever you need to do to get all of those pent-up emotions out!

NEIL

[whispering to Todd]

We should go back to the room.

Todd nods and the two break apart. They both make to leave the room quite hastily.

NEIL

Thanks, Captain!

TODD

Yeah, thanks!

Todd and Neil rush out of the room. Mr. Keating looks after them, a knowing look on his face.

KEATING

[yelling after the boys]

You should really consider the poetry reading, Mr. Anderson!

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil rush into the room. As soon as the door is closed they begin to kiss hungrily, obviously having missed the physical contact from the days they spent fighting.

TODD

I'll do it.

NEIL

The poetry reading?

Todd nods. Neil looks excited for a moment before his face falls.

NEIL

[hurt]

You'll do it for Mr. Keating, but you won't do it for me?

TODD

No, Neil, I'm doing it for me. You. Us. I-I didn't know _why_ you wanted me to do it so badly until you told Mr. Keating, and...

Neil cuts him off with a kiss.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil are cuddled together Neil's bed. They are clinging together, as if in an attempt to make up for lost time.

TODD

I missed this.

NEIL

Me too.

The two boys fall asleep in each other's arms, worn out from all the fighting.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

Class hasn't started yet, and student are milling around the room. Todd is sitting at his desk, and talking to Neil, who is standing next to the desk. Mr. Keating walks over to the two.

KEATING

Well, Todd, have you made your decision yet?

TODD

Yeah, I'm going to do it.

KEATING

Wonderful. I would like to come and see you perform, if you don't object.

TODD

Oh..no, I don't mind.

Keating smiles broadly at Todd, before turning to the entire class.

KEATING

Alright, lads, let's get started!

INT. STUDENT LOUNGE-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil are sitting in the mostly empty student lounge, studying. The rest of the Dead Poets walk in together.

PITTS

Hey, Todd, heard you're going to be in that poetry reading thing.

TODD

Yeah.

PITTS

That's so cool!

TODD

Thanks, Pitts.

The Dead Poets sit down.

MEEKS

We get to go, right?

TODD

Of course.

CHARLIE

Good, because we'd come even if you didn't want us to.

Todd blanches. Neil squeezes Todd's knee under the table. Todd smiles slightly at the encouragement from Neil. Todd turns to Neil.

TODD

Hey, Neil, will you go down to the library with me this weekend? I need to sign up for the poetry reading.

NEIL

Sounds like fun!

INT. PUBLIC LIBRARY-AFTERNOON

Todd and Neil walk into the library. Todd has Diffracting Darkness in his hand. He puts it in the "return" bin, looking a bit sad.

NEIL

Why so sad?

TODD

It's just a good book. I wish I could keep it.

NEIL

Buy a copy.

TODD

My parents don't give me any pocket money.

NEIL

Oh, I never got any either. Especially not since getting disowned...Should we go get you signed up?

TODD

Yeah.

Todd marches up to the desk, oddly confident. The librarian, who is a little old lady with her gray hair tied in a bun and glasses perched on her nose.

LIBRARIAN

How can I help you?

TODD

I'd like to sign up for the poetry reading.

LIBRARIAN

Okay, sweetie, what's your name?

TODD

Todd Anderson.

The librarian writes Todd's name down on a list.

LIBRARIAN

Thanks sweetie, you're all set. See you in three weeks!

TODD

Thank you.

Neil watches this whole exchange from a few feet away. When Todd is standing next to him again Neil speaks.

NEIL

Look at you, being all confident.

Todd just smiles.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil are in the process of getting ready for class.

NEIL

So, do you know which poem you'll be performing yet?

TODD

[smiling]

Mm-hm.

NEIL

Are you gonna tell me?

TODD

I want it to be a surprise.

NEIL

Oh, ok.

TODD

[bashfully]

Can...I tell you something?

NEIL

Todd, you know you can tell me anything.

TODD

I'm really nervous.

Neil engulfs Todd in a hug, chuckling.

NEIL

Of course you're nervous.

TODD

Aren't you supposed to comfort me? Tell me there's nothing to be nervous about?

NEIL

What, and lie to you? Of course there are things to be nervous about. Not that you should be, you'll do brilliantly. But it is very understandable for you to be nervous.

TODD

You're not helping...

NEIL

Oh, don't you worry your pretty little head, this is only the beginning of Operation Make Todd Un-Nervous.

TODD

[chuckling]

I love you.

NEIL

Love you too.

INT. ENGLISH CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

Class has just ended. All of the boys are rushing off to chemistry, except for Todd, who hangs back.

KEATING

Get going, Todd, you don't want to be late.

TODD

I was actually wondering if I could talk to you later today about the poetry reading. I-I need some tips on dealing with stage fright.

KEATING

I'd love to tell you everything I know. Come see me in my office sometime this evening, and I'll tell you all my secrets.

TODD

Thank you, Captain.

KEATING

Any time, Mr. Anderson.

INT. CHEMISTRY CLASSROOM-AFTERNOON

Class is in full swing. Todd shows up late again, and again he manages to slip into his seat without the teacher noticing.

NEIL

[whispering]

Welcome to class, ninja.

Todd smiles, shaking his head slightly.

INT. STUDENT LOUNGE-EVENING

The Dead Poets are sitting around, doing homework. Todd suddenly slams his textbook shut and stands up.

NEIL

Where are you going?

TODD

To talk to Mr. Keating.

NEIL

Why?

TODD

He's going to give me some advice on battling my performance anxiety.

NEIL

[clearly upset about something]

Oh...okay.

Todd walks out of the student lounge. The Dead Poets shout "advice" after him.

KNOX

Fall in love with a girl, write her a love poem, have her come, and then pretend that she's the only person in the audience!

PITTS

Do an interpretive dance!

CHARLIE

Imagine the whole audience naked!

INT. KEATING'S OFFICE-EVENING

The door is open. Mr. Keating is sitting at his desk. Todd appears in the doorway. Todd clears his throat.

TODD

Captain...? Can I come in?

KEATING

Of course Mr. Anderson, come right in! Close the door on your way in, and have a seat.

Todd does as Mr. Keating says.

KEATING

So, performance anxiety. Believe it or not, something I used to deal with.

TODD

Really?

KEATING

Yes, which is lucky for you, because it means that the advice I give you will have come from experience, and be proven to work.

TODD

Thank goodness.

KEATING

What do you experience when you're nervous?

TODD

It becomes hard to breathe, and my mind goes blank.

KEATING

Symptoms I, myself, have experienced. The most important thing to do is to remember to breathe. I know, I know, easier said than done. Practice. Practice controlling your breath. I know it sounds silly, but I promise you, it helps. As for the mind going blank thing, the best thing you can do is to prepare yourself as much as possible. Read through your poem so many times that you could recite it in your sleep. Read it out loud, even if just to an empty room. Breathe, acquaint yourself with your poem as much as you can.

TODD

Thanks, Captain, I think that'll really help.

KEATING

Any time, Todd, any time. I'm looking forward to this event.

TODD

Me too, even though it scares me out of my mind.

INT. STUDENT LOUNGE-EVENING

The Dead Poets are sitting where they were when Todd left. They are having a very heated argument about something. Todd sits down in the seat he vacated not too long ago. The Dead Poets don't really seem to notice Todd's return, except Neil, who reaches to grasp Todd's hand under the table. After a few more minutes of arguing the rest of the Dead Poets realize Todd is back.

KNOX

Todd, you're back!

Todd nods.

CHARLIE

How long have you been sitting there? I didn't notice you walk in.

NEIL

Oh, he's been here for a while. He's just got mad awesome ninja skills.

PITTS

Oh, is that so.

NEIL

Yep!

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil are snuggling in Todd's bed.

NEIL

I thought that was my job.

TODD

What's your job?

NEIL

Helping you get over your performance anxiety.

TODD

Neil...that's not anybody's job.

NEIL

But..Operation Make Todd Un-Nervous. I had so many things planned...but then you went to talk to Mr. Keating, so all of your problems are solved, and...

TODD

Neil, Neil, Neil...just stop, okay? Yes, I talked to Mr. Keating, and yes, he gave me some helpful advice, but I'm still scared out of my mind about all of this.

NEIL

So, Operation Make Todd Un-Nervous is still a go?

TODD

Yes, 'Operation Make Todd Un-Nervous' is still a go. But right now I just want you to hold me while I fall asleep.

NEIL

I think I can make that happen.


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

**MONTAGE** INT. VARIOUS LOCATIONS-VARIOUS TIMES OF DAY

We see Todd in various states of panic over the poetry reading. We see Neil doing various things to try to distract Todd from his stress. We see Todd staring off into space during class, putting very little effort into homework, and picking at his food during meals.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

Todd is obviously stressed, chewing on his bottom lip. Neil bounds over to Todd and kisses him

TODD

What are you doing?

NEIL

Kissing you?

TODD

Why?

NEIL

Because you're my boyfriend and I love you? Because you're stressed and I'm trying to distract you?

TODD

Eh. Never mind, I don't care about reasons anymore. Just kiss me again.

NEIL

As you wish.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

You're the best.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

TODD

What?

NEIL

Frostbite!

Todd chuckles.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

You're handsome.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

Todd and Neil are sitting side by side on Neil's bed, hands clasped.

NEIL

I'm worried about you.

TODD

Why?

NEIL

Because your nervousness about the poetry reading is consuming you. You haven't been as attentive in classes lately, you're struggling to get your homework done, and I've noticed you've been eating less.

TODD

I'm fine.

NEIL

No, Todd, you're not. And I've been trying to make it better, to help you, but I'm struggling. Struggling at helping you through your struggles.

TODD

Good, we can struggle together.

NEIL

Don't talk like that. We should be trying to get rid of the struggling altogether.

TODD

But we can't. It's just a part of life.

NEIL

That doesn't mean we can't try to get rid of it.

TODD

Fair enough.

STUDENT LOUNGE

Todd is looking at his math homework in utter confusion-having not paid attention in class. Neil notices and hands Todd his own math solutions as an invitation to copy the answers.

TODD

Thanks.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

You're amazing.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

What type of star is dangerous?

TODD

Um...

NEIL

A shooting star!

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

Neil is sitting on the radiator. Todd walks in. Neil jumps off the radiator, strides over to Todd and kisses him.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

TODD

I think I'm going to go drown myself in the shower.

NEIL

When you're done with that, I promise we can snuggle.

TODD

Okay, no drowning.

NEIL

Good, because I'd miss you terribly.

...

Todd returns from his shower to find the room completely rearranged. The beds are pushed together, the desks are facing each other in the little nook with the window and radiator, and the wardrobes are clumped together in a corner.

TODD

What the hell?

NEIL

Why the hell not?

TODD

You're lucky I love you.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

What did the water say to the boat?

TODD

I don't know, Neil.

NEIL

Nothing, it just waved!

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

NEIL

You're awesome.

TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM

Todd is pacing around the room, silently mouthing the words of his poem. Neil walks in, walks right up to Todd and kisses him.


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

It is the night before the poetry reading. Todd is beyond nervous. Todd and Neil are on Todd's bed. Todd is curled up in Neil's arms, clutching to Neil as if he were a lifeline.

NEIL

Relax, Todd, everything is going to be fine.

TODD

[his voice muffled in Neil's tee shirt]

What if it isn't?

NEIL

It will be.

TODD

You don't know that.

NEIL

Yes, I do. It's late, you should try to get some rest. It'll be good for you.

TODD

Don't leave me.

NEIL

I won't, ever.

The light changes slightly. All of the lights are now off and Todd and Neil are sleeping in Todd's bed, Neil's arms around Todd. Todd whimpers in his sleep. Neil wakes up when Todd starts to thrash around.

NEIL

Todd, wake up.

Todd continues to whimper and thrash about, still in a fitful sleep. Neil shakes Todd.

NEIL

Wake up, Todd, wake up.

Todd awakes with a start. There is utter silence as Todd looks into Neil's eyes for a moment. Todd bursts into tears. Neil pulls Todd to him and Todd buries his head in the crook of Neil's neck. Neil rubs Todd's back.

NEIL

Shh...it's okay...

TODD

N-no it-it's n-not...

Neil pulls Todd closer to him, if that is even possible.

NEIL

Yes it is.

Todd shakes his head, his body shaking with sobs.

TODD

It...it's not. I...tomorrow...I...I'm going to _fail_.

NEIL

No, you're not, Todd, you're _not_.

TODD

Y-you ca-can't s-say t-that f-f-for s-ure.

NEIL

You trust me, don't you?

TODD

Y-yes.

NEIL

Than trust me when I tell you you'll be fine.

TODD

I...I c-can't.

NEIL

Why not?

TODD

B-because...bec-because I just c-can't!

NEIL

Todd...

TODD

I...I d-dreamt th-that I w-was s-standing in-in front of a-a l-lot of p-people. M-millions, b-billions. A-and I f-forgot my w-whole p-poem, s-so I h-h-had to m-make some-something up, and i-it was a-awful! M-my p-parents w-were there, a-and th-they t-told me I was a-a f-failure. A-and th-then _Walt Whitman_ sh-showed u-up and h-he...he...he t-told me I-I'm a-a disgrace to p-poets everywhere.

Neil pulls back, so that he can look into Todd's eyes.

NEIL

Listen to me, okay?

Neil wipes the tears off Todd's cheeks as Todd nods.

NEIL

There are not going to be millions or billions of people there. You are not going to forget your poem, and even if you did, you're brilliant at making up poems on the spot. Sweaty-toothed madman, remember? You're going to remember your poem, and your parents won't be there. You are _not_ a failure, and you most certainly are not a disgrace to poets.

Todd has stopped crying. He looks a Neil, wanting to believe what his boyfriend is telling him, but clearly having a hard time doing that.

NEIL

Is this a situation where kisses help, or is this a situation where kisses make things worse?

TODD

I-I...make it better.

Neil leans forward and kisses Todd tenderly.

NEIL

Go back to sleep. Things will look better in the morning. I'll keep you safe.

TODD

[sleepily, right before drifting off to sleep]

I love you.

Neil whispers to the sleeping boy in his arms.

NEIL

I love you, Todd.


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil are still curled together in Todd's bed. Neil is awake, Todd still asleep in his arms. Todd's eyes flutter open.

NEIL

Good morning.

TODD

[smiling]

Morning.

Todd's face freezes, and then falls as he remembers what is happening later.

TODD

You know how you said things would look better in the morning?

NEIL

Um-mm?

TODD

They don't.

NEIL

Todd...everything is going to be fine.

TODD

You keep saying that, but you have no way of knowing.

Neil stands up abruptly, pulling Todd with him.

NEIL

Come on, get dressed!

TODD

Why? Where are we going?

NEIL

To get you mind off of things!

Todd reluctantly starts to get dressed. Neil dresses at an amazing speed, and then rushes towards the door.

NEIL

I'll be right back!

Todd, who is used to Neil's antics, just continues getting dressed. Todd finishes getting dressed just before Neil returns, the other Dead Poets in tow. Neil grabs Todd's arm, and pulls him out of the room.

NEIL

Come on then!

TODD

Where are you taking me?

NEIL

Breakfast, and then we're going outside!

TODD

Outside? For what?

NEIL

To have fun!

EXT. WELTON GROUNDS-MORNING

The Dead Poets stand in a clump. Everyone is looking at Neil.

NEIL

So. Todd's poetry reading is this evening. He's stressed. We're going to fix that.

TODD

Um...how, exactly?

NEIL

Um...that is a very good questions.

Neil pauses for a minute.

NEIL

Todd, you stay right there. The rest of you, follow me.

Neil walks off across the grass, the rest of the Dead Poets behind him. They form a tight circle, talking softly enough that Todd can't hear them. Todd looks at them apprehensively.

TODD

[calling out to his friends]

This is stressing me out even more, you know!

The other Dead Poets talk for only a bit longer before breaking of their circle. They all turn to face Todd, mischievous smiles on their faces. They begin to walk back towards Todd, mocking looks of "menace" on their faces.

TODD

Whatever you guys have come up with, I really don't like it.

NEIL

ATTACK!

TODD

Oh no...

The Dead Poets, Neil in the front, and therefore the first to reach Todd, run at Todd, tackling him to the ground. Pitts shouts as the Dead Poets pile them on top of Todd.

PITTS

Pig pile!

Neil, who is directly on top of Todd brushes his lips against Todd's cheek in a fleeting kiss. None of the other Dead Poets notice this, but even if they did, they wouldn't be able to make much of it, since it looks like Neil's head got pushed towards Todd's in the downward momentum of the Dead Poets piling on Todd. Todd blushes when Neil's lips touch his cheek. The other Dead Poets fall out of the pig pile, and Neil sits on Todd to keep him pinned to the ground. Neil tickles Todd, who squirms, trying to get away from Neil.

TODD

YAWP!

Todd pushes Neil off of himself, scrambles to standing, and runs off across the grass. Neil and the other Dead Poets chase after him, which leads to the group running around and being silly, not really playing any game, but enjoying themselves none the less.

INT. DINING HALL-EVENING

The Dead Poets all sit together, enjoying dinner. Except Todd, who isn't eating-just pushing his food around his plate.

NEIL

Todd, you've got to eat something. You barely ate breakfast, and we missed lunch...

TODD

[softly]

I can't...I'm too nervous.

NEIL

Todd, come on. Please? Going into something like this on an empty stomach is a bad idea.

TODD

I guess you're right.

Todd takes a few bites as everyone else goes back to talking. Todd suddenly stands up, looking uncomfortable.

TODD

I think I'm gonna be sick.

Todd rushes out of the room, the Dead Poets staring after him.

NEIL

Shit.

Neil stands up and rushes after Todd.

INT. BATHROOM-EVENING

Neil rushes into the bathroom. We can hear Todd retching. Neil rushes to the stall Todd is in. Neil drops down to his knees behind Todd, who is now done vomiting, but still has his head over the toilet bowl, scared that there might be more. Neil rubs Todd's back soothingly. Todd heaves one last time, but nothing come out.

NEIL

I think that's all of it...come on, up you get.

Neil stands up, pulling Todd with him. Todd is shaky on his feet. Neil wraps an arm around Todd's waist to steady him.

TODD

Water...

Neil guides Todd over to the sink, where he turns on the tap and Todd uses a cupped hand to drink.

NEIL

Better?

TODD

Mm-mm.

NEIL

You don't have to do this, you know. If it makes you this nervous, perhaps it isn't a good idea.

TODD

No, I have to do it.

NEIL

No, Todd, you don't.

TODD

But I promised you I would. And Mr. Keating.

NEIL

Todd, if you decide not to do it, we'll completely understand.

TODD

I promised _myself_ I'd do it. And if I don't, I just have one more reason to be hard on myself.

NEIL

Okay, okay, I get it. You sure you going to be okay?

TODD

Yeah. I'm starting to feel better already.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-EVENING

Todd and Neil are just finishing getting ready. Todd is fidgeting with his clothes.

NEIL

Todd, you look fine.

TODD

Really?

NEIL

Yeah. More than fine, actually.

TODD

[blushing]

A kiss for good luck?

NEIL

Not that you need it, but...

Neil leans in to kiss Todd.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE PUBLIC LIBRARY-EVENING

The Dead Poets and Mr. Keating stand outside the public library, Todd and Neil at the front of the group. Todd seems to have frozen in the middle of the side walk.

NEIL

You ready for this?

Todd sighs, then nods before striding to the door and leading the group into the library.

INT. PUBLIC LIBRARY-EVENING

The Dead Poets and Mr. Keating stand near the doorway, a bit unsure of what to do. There are quite a few people milling around. The librarian who put Todd on the sign up list hobbles over, a smile on her face.

LIBRARIAN

Todd Anderson, right?

TODD

Yes, ma'am.

LIBRARIAN

We'll be starting soon, but feel free to mingle until we do. All of you, feel free to enjoy the refreshments.

TODD

Thank you, ma'am.

The librarian shuffles off to go do something. Charlie, Pitts, Meeks, Knox and Cameron all go off in search of the refreshments, talking excitedly. Todd and Neil stay put, and Mr. Keating hangs back.

KEATING

How are you feeling Todd?

TODD

[his voice squeaks]

Nervous.

NEIL

You'll do brilliantly, I promise.

Todd looks like he wants to argue, but is too nervous to do so. Todd and Neil share a look, and Mr. Keating, sensing that the two need some alone time, wanders off. Todd's eyes are wide with nerves, and Neil looks at him with concern.

NEIL

[softly, so that only Todd can hear him]

Todd, I just want you to know that I am so proud of you. _So_ proud. Proud that you picked up that flier that one day. Proud that you made the decision to do this. And no matter what happens what you're up on that stage, I love you.

TODD

...I...I'm just scared that I'll open my mouth and nothing will come out.

NEIL

Todd, don't be ridiculous. You're going to be amazing.

The other Dead Poets come bounding back over, cups of punch and cookies in their hands.

CHARLIE

Neil, a cookie?

NEIL

[somewhat distracted]

Thanks.

CAMERON

Todd?

TODD

No, thanks. No more food for me until this is over.

The librarian steps up onto the platform "stage" set up for the event and gets the attention of the crowd.

LIBRARIAN

We'll be starting in a few minutes, so if you could all find seats...poets, come join me to the side of the stage.

Some people are already sitting. The rest of the crowd moves to the folding chairs set up facing the "stage." The Dead Poets move to sit down. Todd puts a hand on Neil's arm. Neil hangs back, confusion on his face. Todd whispers into Neil's ear.

TODD

[smiling slyly]

This is for you.

Todd walks off to join the poets sitting in chairs along the back wall, to the right of the stage. Neil stands still for a moment, before rushing to sit down with the other Dead Poets and Mr. Keating.

LIBRARIAN

Thank you all so much for coming. Shall we get this started?

**MONTAGE**

We hear snippets of five of the other poets.

POET #1

...angels have issues too...

POET #2

...noise fills the space...

POET #3

...ribs folding in on themselves...

POET #4

...rises from deep within...

POET #5

...dreaming the past...

Todd is next. Todd glances at Neil as he steps up onto the stage and stands there in silence for a few moments before beginning to recite his poem. Todd looks over the heads of the entire audience as he recites.

TODD

I wonder

How you

Pull me

Out of

My shell

I wonder

How you

Act

The way

You do

I wonder

How you

Make me

Want to

Act

Like you

I wonder

Why

My

Breath hitches

Every time

Your hand

Accidentally

Brushes

Against mine

I wonder

Why you

Smile

At me

The way

You do

I wonder

How

It's possible

For you

To care

About me

The way

I care

About you

I wonder

Why

You listen

To me

When no one

Else will

They say to not fix it if it ain't broken

So

I

Don't wonder

Anymore

Because I've found happiness with you

When Todd finishes the audience claps, just they have done for all of the other poets. Neil, however, just sits in his seat, stunned. He is so overcome with emotion that he is struggling to know what to feel. Neil has a stunned look on his face for the rest of the poetry reading. The smile on Todd's face shows just how relieved he is to be done. Todd moves off the "stage."

**MONTAGE**

We hear snippets from the rest of the poets.

POET #6

...grabbed by the fistful...

POET #7

...dancing on clouds...

POET #8

...the moon shines bright...

POET #9

...numb to the touch...

The last poet moves off the "stage" and the librarian stands in front of the audience one more time.

LIBRARIAN

Once again, thank you so much for coming. Please stay to talk with the poets and finish of the refreshments.

The librarian moves off the stage and people start to stand up and move about. Todd makes his way over to his friends and teacher, who are making their way towards him. Neil looks as if he is in a trance. Todd is practically bouncing.

KEATING

Absolutely wonderful, Todd, absolutely wonderful. Whoever that was for is very lucky.

Mr. Keating gives Todd a knowing smile. Todd's smile falters at the look Mr. Keating gives him, but returns when the Dead Poets start congratulating him. Neil is still in his shocked trance.

PITTS

That was amazing!

CHARLIE

Never would have expected _that_!

KNOX

Awesome!

MEEKS

That was great!

CAMERON

Very well written.

TODD

Thanks, guys.

Todd looks to Neil, who still hasn't said anything.

NEIL

Todd...I...no words...

TODD

If I've left _you_ speechless, it must have been pretty good, huh?

Neil breaks out of his trance and smiles.

NEIL

Don't get cocky with me.

TODD

Yeah? What are you going to do about it?

Todd and Neil share a look.

PITTS

Well, dang...we should have gotten Todd to do this earlier.

The whole groups cracks up, including Mr. Keating. Neil slips back into his stunned trance.

KEATING

What do you say boys, should we head back?

TODD

Yes, please.

Todd yawns.

TODD

Sorry, guys, but I'm really tired. Haven't really slept that much recently.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

Neil practically drags Todd into the room. Neil pushes Todd against the door, closing it. Neil kisses Todd passionately.

NEIL

Todd...you...I..._I love you so much_...and _oh god_ that _poem_...

TODD

I love you too.

NEIL

God...I know that, _silly_. I just...can't believe you wrote that about _me_.

TODD

It's because you inspire me.

NEIL

_You_ inspire _me_.

Todd kisses Neil. Neil pulls away slowly, reluctantly.

NEIL

I know it's common to get people flowers or something when they perform. I didn't get you flowers, but I got you something else.

TODD

Neil...you didn't have to...

NEIL

I know, but I wanted to.

Neil pulls away and moves towards his desk. He opens the drawer, reached way in the back and pulls out a book. It is a copy of Diffracting Darkness.

NEIL

I saw how sad you were when you had to return it to the library. I had to sell a few things to get the money to buy it, and this is a used copy, but...

Todd shuts him up with a kiss. This time, Neil doesn't pull away.

TODD

You're too good to me.

NEIL

You, sir, deserve it.

TODD

See what I mean?

NEIL

Nope. There's no such thing as being too good to you.

TODD

You're going to make me cry.

NEIL

Good. Because that poem almost made me burst into tears, right in the middle of the public library.

TODD

Neil...I didn't...didn't mean for...

NEIL

Tears of happiness Todd, tears of happiness.

Todd yawns.

TODD

Snuggle me to sleep?

NEIL

You needn't have asked.


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING

Todd and Neil are curled up in Todd's bed. Both of them are awake, but they sit in a content silence.

NEIL

Do...do you ever want to tell people about us?

TODD

I think Mr. Keating already knows.

NEIL

Well, of course he does. Doesn't miss a thing, does he?

TODD

No, not really.

NEIL

But...but other people? The other Dead Poets?

TODD

I...I don't know. I mean, I've thought about it, but...I'm scared of how people will react.

NEIL

I know. It's just...sometimes I wish we didn't have to keep it a secret, you know?

TODD

I do. And I don't like keeping it a secret any more than you do, but I-I'm just not ready to face telling people yet. I've had enough stress in my life recently, thank you very much.

NEIL

A secret it stays.

There are a few moments of content silence.

NEIL

So...Valentine's Day is coming up.

TODD

We should do something special.

NEIL

Oh, wait...you don't know about the dance, do you?

TODD

No...?

NEIL

Every year Welton hosts a Valentine's Day dance and invites the girls from Henley Hall.

TODD

Well, that sounds...awful.

NEIL

Oh, come on, it'll be fun!

TODD

No, it sounds like a horrendous waste of time.

NEIL

I won't let it be a waste of time.

TODD

Promise?

NEIL

From the bottom of my heart.

TODD

Love you.

NEIL

Love you too.

They kiss.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-AFTERNOON

Neil is sitting on his bed, concentrating on his homework. Todd walks into the room, and sits down on his own bed, unnoticed by Neil. They both work for a while before Neil looks up, finally noticing that Todd is in the room.

NEIL

Todd! When did you get here?

TODD

Twenty minutes ago?

NEIL

Damn...you are a ninja, aren't you?

TODD

I suppose?

NEIL

Come here, my ninja Walt Whitman, I want to kiss you.

Todd laughs as he moves across the room. He sits down next to Neil and the two kiss.

TODD

Is that my nickname now? Ninja Walt Whitman?

NEIL

Do you want it to be?

TODD

I wouldn't mind, as long as you're the only one who gets to call me it.


	20. Chapter 20

**So, this is the last chapter-the end. Thank you so much to everyone who has stuck with me and this story. You're all awesome.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Poets Society. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.**

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-MORNING-VALENTINES DAY

Todd and Neil are asleep in Neil's bed. Neil wakes up and gives Todd a chaste kiss. Todd's eyes open. He is smiling.

TODD

Best way to wake up, ever.

NEIL

Happy Valentine's Day.

TODD

Happy Valentine's Day.

NEIL

I...I wrote you a poem.

TODD

You...you did?

NEIL

Yeah. It's nowhere near as brilliant as the one you wrote me, but...

TODD

Neil, don't. Just let me read it.

NEIL

Ok, but don't laugh at me, okay?

TODD

Why would I laugh at you? You wrote me a love poem. I can't laugh at that.

NEIL

God, I love you.

TODD

Obviously, you wrote me a love poem.

Neil chuckles and gets up, walking over to his desk to retrieve a piece of paper. He returns to the bed and hands Todd the piece of paper. Neil settles in with his back against the headboard of his bed. Todd sits in between Neil's legs, his back against Neil's chest. Todd looks down at the paper he holds in his hands.

TODD

Will you read it to me?

NEIL

Of course.

Neil leans forward to read the poem, reading it softly into Todd's ear.

NEIL

Things I Love About Todd Anderson by Neil Perry

I love your smile

Your eyes

Your fingers entwined with mine

I love when your usually quiet voice gets loud

When your eyes light up when you see me

When your whole being glows when you write

I love your arms around me

But mostly, I love holding you in my arms

When Neil finishes reading Todd turns around to face him, his eyes misty.

TODD

It's the best poem written about me, ever.

NEIL

It's the only poem written about you ever.

TODD

I still love it.

NEIL

Yeah?

TODD

Yeah, but not as much as I love you.

NEIL

Yeah, and how much do you love me?

TODD

This much...

Todd kisses Neil. When the kiss ends Todd's face glows for a moment before falling.

NEIL

What's the matter?

TODD

I don't have anything to give you, and I feel like a bad boyfriend.

NEIL

Todd...you're not a bad boyfriend, you hear?

TODD

But you gave me a love poem on Valentine's Day, and I don't have anything to give you.

NEIL

I don't _need_ anything from you, though.

TODD

That doesn't stop me from wishing I had something to give you.

NEIL

Todd, just stop it, alright?

TODD

But I can't just stop it...

NEIL

We're going for a walk.

TODD

What?

NEIL

You heard me, we're going for a walk.

TODD

Is this just an excuse to hold my hand?

NEIL

[smirking]

Perhaps.

TODD

Well, I couldn't turn that down, could I?

NEIL

You'd be pretty silly to.

Todd gives Neil a quick kiss.

TODD

Well, come on then, let's go for your walk.

NEIL

_Our_ walk.

TODD

Our walk.

EXT. WOODS-LATE MORNING

Todd and Neil walk hand in hand. It is still winter-patches of snow and ice, but spring is definitely on its way. Todd spots a single flower. He pulls his hand out of Neil's and picks the flower. Todd returns to Neil, stands in front of him and holds the flower out to him.

TODD

Happy Valentine's Day, Neil.

Neil takes the flower from Todd.

NEIL

Thank you. I've never been given flowers before.

TODD

A single flower.

NEIL

But a flower none the less.

The smile fondly at each other.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-EARLY EVENING

Todd and Neil are both dressed nicely-the Valentine's Day dance is starting soon. They are helping each other get rid of wrinkles and straightening ties.

TODD

I don't want to do this.

NEIL

I know. But we have to. I promise I'll make it worth your time.

TODD

I know. Promise we can cuddle after? It'll give me something to look forward to.

NEIL

Promise.

They kiss. They break apart when there is a knock on the door. Neil opens the door to reveal the other Dead Poets.

PITTS

You guys ready?

TODD

[sighing]

As ready as I'll ever be.

CHARLIE

Come on, Todd, girls!

TODD

You know how awkward I am, Charlie...

NEIL

Come on guys, let's just go!

INT. WELTON GYM-EVENING

The dance has just started. The scene we see is that classic cliché where all of the boys stand on one side of the gym and all of the girls stand on the other. Ginny Danburry (who was in A Midsummer's Night Dream with Neil) is looking at Neil. Neil's eyes find Ginny's.

NEIL

Hey, Ginny! Dance with me!

This sets the dance in motion, and pretty soon the whole dance floor is filled. We see Charlie chatting up as many girls as he can. Knox looks like he is trying to have good time, but is failing-presumably because he'd much rather be with Chris. Cameron is a bit awkward, but he can seen dancing with a few girls. Pitts and Meeks are having fun getting into dancing. Todd stands off to the side of the gym while Neil dances with Ginny. Neil keeps glancing in Todd's direction. Mr. Keating appears next to Todd.

KEATING

Hello, Mr. Anderson, enjoying yourself?

TODD

Oh, hi Captain. What are you doing here?

KEATING

Chaperoning.

TODD

Oh.

KEATING

So, enjoying yourself?

TODD

Dances aren't really my thing. But Neil wouldn't let me stay behind...

KEATING

And yet he was quick to abandon you to dance with someone else.

TODD

A friend of his from the play. And I don't really mind. I'm not a very good dancer.

KEATING

You just haven't had enough practice yet!

Neil suddenly appears in front of Todd and Mr. Keating, slightly out of breath from dancing.

NEIL

Hello, Captain!

KEATING

Hello, Mr. Perry. Enjoying yourself?

NEIL

Yes, sir.

KEATING

Good, good. I'll leave you to it.

Mr. Keating begins to walk away. A few yards away he turns around.

KEATING

Oh, and Mr. Perry? Drag Todd on to the dance floor with you, will you? He seems under the delusion that he can't dance. I want you to prove to him that he _can_.

Mr. Keating smirks before turning around and disappearing into the crowd. Neil turns, smiling broadly to Todd.

NEIL

Well, come on then!

TODD

[bowing his head and lowering his voice]

But you know we can't dance together, people will throw a fit.

NEIL

Yeah, I know that. But I know Ginny, and she knows other girls from Henley Hall, so we'll find someone for you to dance with!

TODD

But...I don't want to.

NEIL

Todd. You didn't get all dressed up like that just to stand around looking sorry for yourself. Now come _on_.

TODD

Fine.

Neil leads the way to where Ginny is getting herself some punch.

NEIL

Hey, Ginny!

GINNY

Hi.

NEIL

This is Todd.

GINNY

Hello.

TODD

Hello.

NEIL

He's a bit reluctant to dance, so I was wondering if maybe you could dance with him? Poor guy would spend the whole night standing alone in a corner if he had his way. And you know, we really can't have that.

GINNY

[giggling softly]

Oh, um sure.

Todd gives Neil a look that says "I hate you" before leading Ginny out onto the dance floor.

TODD

I'm just gonna warn you now, I have no idea as to what I'm doing.

GINNY

Me neither, to tell you the truth.

TODD

This is going to be awkward, isn't it?

GINNY

Yeah...

They dance for a few moments in silence.

GINNY

So, um, how do you know Neil?

TODD

We're roommates.

GINNY

Oh.

TODD

You were good in A Midsummer's Night Dream.

GINNY

[smiling]

Thanks.

They dance until the song ends, when they move off the dance floor in a silently made mutual agreement. Neil bounds up to them.

NEIL

So? Dancing? Good? Yeah?

Todd and Ginny both nod and make claims of agreement.

GINNY

Well, I'm going to go talk to some of my friends. Bye!

TODD AND NEIL

Bye!

NEIL

So, really, how was it?

TODD

It was...oddly pleasant. I mean, we're both pretty shy, so it was a bit awkward, but it could have been worse I suppose. Neither of us stepped on the other's foot or anything, so that's good.

INT. TODD AND NEIL'S ROOM-NIGHT

Todd and Neil walk into the room after the dance.

TODD

Can...can I kiss you? I've been wanting to for hours...

NEIL

Todd...you don't need to ask me to kiss me.

Todd kisses Neil. When they pull out of the kiss Neil is the first one to speak.

NEIL

So? Was I able to keep my promise and ensure that it wasn't a waste of your time?

TODD

It was better than I expected, but...

NEIL

But...?

TODD

But I only really wanted one thing.

NEIL

And what is that?

TODD

To slow dance with you.

Neil, without saying a word, pulls Todd to him, and starts slow dancing. Music swells as the two dance. The lighting slowly fades to black.

* * *

**The End. I'm not sure exactly when or what I'll be posting next, but hopefully I'll have something for you guys soon.**


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